


the night is an ocean and the stars are its fleet

by oscarlovesthesea



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Gen or Pre-Slash, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Sharing a Bed, i just want zolf and wilde to hold hands and talk about the WEEK they had, i miss sasha, old married couple dynamics, post-157, this was conceived as Zolf/Wilde but you can probably read it as platonic if you want to?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:01:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24525067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oscarlovesthesea/pseuds/oscarlovesthesea
Summary: “When was the last time you slept?” He asks.Oscar gestures vaguely.“Wilde…” Zolf sighs.“I’m fine.”“Yeah, okay, we’re not gonna do the thing where we pretend we both don’t know that’s a lie,” Zolf argues, getting up from his chair. “Come on.”“What?”“I’m making sure you get some sleep,” Zolf says, steady. It’s not that they haven’t done this before. “Come with me.”
Relationships: (IMPLIED), Hamid Saleh Haroun al-Tahan & Zolf Smith, Sasha Racket & Oscar Wilde, Sasha Racket & Zolf Smith, Zolf Smith/Oscar Wilde
Comments: 25
Kudos: 111





	the night is an ocean and the stars are its fleet

**Author's Note:**

> So fun fact, this is the first time ever I post a fic in the same category more than once. Thanks to Alexander J Newall for giving me RQG brainrot I guess.
> 
> Title was found by Enea, my wonderful beta reader, and is based on "The Night is an Ocean" by Winter Aid.

Zolf gives himself a few hours by the sea. He takes in the breeze, the ocean seemingly calm and clear for the first time in years. It’s at times like these that Zolf realises why things went wrong with Poseidon, why he never made Zolf feel the same freedom that he felt when he was young and he would sneak away from his brother’s sight to go see the ocean. It had never been Poseidon, it was the sea all along. It had enchanted him for years, offering freedom from the suffocating life in the mines, and the sea was too big even for a god. Poseidon was codes of obedience and strict rules, but the sea is unbridled, uncaring of decorum and commandments. Zolf sits on the seaside, and takes in the immense vastness around him as slowly, very slowly, he almost finds some semblance of peace.  _ This  _ is the world he’s trying to save.

It's late when he gets back to the inn, the sky having already darkened and the lights turned off in most of the windows except for, of course, Oscar’s makeshift study. Zolf sighs, goes into the kitchen and quietly prepares two cups of tea, then heads up to the study. The door’s slightly ajar, light pouring out onto the corridor, so he doesn’t really bother with knocking, just leans his head into the doorway and clears his throat. And then, when Oscar doesn’t react, he does it again.

“Mmh?” Oscar looks up from his papers, his eyes widening slightly with surprise as he registers Zolf’s presence.

“How long have you been at that?”

Oscar rubs his eyes. “I don’t know, how long ago did you leave?” 

“Gods,” Zolf sighs. He walks over to the table and sets the teacup in front of Oscar, then sits down on the chair across from him. “How is it going?”

“Thank you,” Oscar says, picking up the teacup, “and I don’t know. I spoke to Curie, who doesn’t know where Einstein is, but she reckons but she reckons Freud might know, except I can’t find him either, and also he’s insufferable, so.”

“You know, if Einstein doesn’t work out, we  _ can _ just go for Earhart.”

Oscar groans, hiding his face in his hands. “Well,  _ you  _ can say that.”

“She’s not that bad.”

“She did point a pistol at me.” Oscar argues, face still hidden behind his hands.

Despite himself, Zolf chuckles. “Tell you what, if she points a pistol at you this time, I’ll stand in her way.”

Oscar looks up at him, one eyebrow raised. “Well, now I feel safe.” He says, deadpan.

He looks tired. His eyes are red, his hands slightly shaky as he takes a sip from his tea, and it’s not that Zolf doesn’t know that this is how he gets when there is something to be done, because gods know he does the same, but there is still something about seeing Oscar this way that frustrates him to no end.

“When was the last time you slept?” He asks.

Oscar gestures vaguely.

“Wilde…” Zolf sighs.

“I’m fine.”

“Yeah, okay, we’re not gonna do the thing where we pretend we both don’t know that’s a lie,” Zolf argues, getting up from his chair. “Come on.”

“What?”

“I’m making sure you get some sleep,” Zolf says, steady. It’s not that they haven’t done this before. “Come with me.”

“Zolf, I have to get this done,” Oscar sighs.

“Well, you won’t be able to get it done if you pass out on your desk with blood coming out of your ears, so come on.”

“I never should have told you about that,” Oscar mumbles, looking up at him with his lips pursed in a slightly too dramatic face as he gets up from his chair and follows Zolf into the corridor. For good measure, Zolf grabs his hand as they head to his bedroom, and he can feel the moment Oscar stiffens for just a second before tangling his fingers with his. They hold hands, sometimes. They also don’t talk about it. It’s fine.

They let go of each other once they’ve made it into the bedroom, as they both change into something more comfortable for the night. Fortunately, the room has been almost untouched for at least ten days, so the night shirt that Zolf left here before he departed for the Shoin institute is not hard to find. Oscar doesn’t ask if he’s staying tonight, simply climbs into the bed in silence as he waits for Zolf. They share a bed sometimes too, and it’s another thing they don’t talk about, to each other or anyone else. Still, Zolf is fairly sure that at least Barnes and Carter have an idea, because he never misses the way Carter’s eyebrows rise and Barnes’s face reddens when he comes down to breakfast from what’s clearly not his room. Whatever they’re thinking, it’s not that. They started a few months into their stay in Japan, one night Zolf couldn’t sleep and he’d heard Oscar scream from his room. He’d rushed up with his glaive ready, expecting monsters to fight, and instead had found Oscar alone, sitting on his bed, face white as he shook breathlessly. He’d looked so scared, and so  _ alone _ , more genuine that Zolf had ever remembered seeing him, that Zolf had dropped his weapon immediately just to go hold him, whispering soothing nothings until they’d fallen asleep in each other’s arms. And now, well, Zolf’s life hasn’t been the kindest, either. Sometimes sleeping is just easier when you are not alone.

“Do you want to talk about what that was, with Hamid?” Oscar asks him as he climbs into the bed.

“I’d rather not.” Zolf grumbles. 

“Alright,” Oscar says. He’s gently threading through his hair with his fingers, in an attempt to comb it. It’s kind of sweet.

“It’s just-” Zolf starts, and doesn’t miss the way Oscar turns to look at him, “I care about him so much? And I am  _ so _ glad to have him back, but-” he sniffles looking up at the wall in front of him, “- working with him is so hard sometimes, and I just. He did all these incredible things that you told me about, right? He’s probably better at this than I am. And yet, when I’m working with him, sometimes, it’s just…” he shakes his head. “Sometimes I worry we’re too different to really manage it, and then what’s the point of any of this?”

“You’ve also done some pretty incredible things,” Oscar tells him. When Zolf turns to face him, he finds him looking back, brow furrowed. “And, despite the… issue, with the kobolds, the mission was a success. You should give yourself more credit.”

“Oh, the kobolds, don’t even-” Zolf sighs. “I’m not the only one who sees that that’s worrying, right?”

Oscar purses his lips. “You are not, but all we can do now is hope it works out for the best, I think.”

Zolf looks at him, at his careful expression, and something inside of him cracks open. “I thought they’d killed you,” he says. “When we were in the cell, I thought they’d killed you, and I couldn’t leave.”

Oscar offers him a joyless smile. “When you told me about the brain I was almost certain you’d been infected,” he tears his eyes away from Zolf’s, looking down at the sheets. “I got that letter when you were gone, and I couldn’t tell you.” He sounds like he’s splitting at the seams. “I couldn’t tell you.”

Zolf waves him off. “I know what the rules are.” 

Oscar nods, but his eyes are glassy. Zolf leans over, and lays his head on Oscar’s shoulder. He feels him exhale against his hair, then wrap an arm around him. For a while, they are quiet, only interrupted by the occasional sniffle.

“She was happy.” Oscar says eventually. 

“She remembered you,” Zolf replies. “She named a child after you.”

“She did,” he feels Oscar shake against him. “And one after you, too.  _ Sagax  _ means sharp, sagacious, you know?”

Oh, Sasha. Sasha, who didn’t trust anyone but all that time ago took a chance on trusting Zolf. Sasha who jumped headfirst into danger, who always said she never expected to live very long, Sasha who would laugh with him when Hamid and Bertie acted  _ like that _ . Sasha who let him go, because she didn’t believe in anyone being forced to stay. Sasha who, eventually, lived a happy life.

“No, I didn’t know that.” He says. For once, he doesn’t feel like crying.

“She still believed in you.” He can hear the small smile in Oscar’s voice. 

“She was too good for any of us, wasn’t she?”

He feels Oscar chuckle. “Oh, absolutely. But where would we be if we hadn’t met her?”

There are no more words to say. Zolf wonders what Sasha would think if she saw them now, leaning against each other, remembering her like the beacon of hope and endurance she hadn’t known she was. He hopes she’d be proud.

That night, Zolf and Oscar fall asleep in each other’s arms, bittersweet memories lulling them to sleep, and for the first time in a while, Zolf sleeps peacefully.

**Author's Note:**

> I would just like......... more bottle episodes okay
> 
> Big fucking shoutout to Enea, my beta-reader and also wonderful friend. I love you so much. You can find him on ao3 as [grassboy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/grassboy) or on twitter as @jimmymagma .  
> I am Oscar, you can find me on tumblr as @jonathanjarchivistsims (or my main @oscarlovsthesea) or on twitter as @oscarlovesthsea . Feel free to come shout with me! Also, I'm usually lurking on the Rusty Quill official server, so you can find me there.  
> I'm out, feel free to leave a comment if you want, and hope you enjoyed!


End file.
